The Beautiful Game

Blogger thought my blog layout could use a face lift, so I thought I'd give this a try.

The World Cup started this weekend, so I have a new sporting event to torment my girlfriend about now that the Stanley Cup playoffs are over (but I mean "torment" in a nice way, really). Our boys in blue did a sporting job against our former rulers, and for those of you who think our goal was a fluke because the England goalkeeper messed up I say to you that it counts the same on the scorecard as a bicycle kick from 20 yards out, so there.

I wonder why our team doesn't have a nickname like some of the cool teams do. For example there are the traditional powers:

Brazil: Seleçao (The Select)
Mexico: El Tri (The Three Color)
Italy: La Azzurri (The Blues)
France: Les Bleus
England: The Three Lions
Germany: Die Mannschaft (The Team)
Spain: La Furia Roja (The Red Fury)
Argentina: La Albiceleste (The White and Sky Blue)
Netherlands: Oranje (The Clockwork Orange)
Portugal: Selecção das Quinas (Selection of the Shields)

While most of these are pretty boring, and in the case of Brazil and Germany somewhat conceited perhaps, at least they have a nickname. Then there are the more interesting ones (besides the Spanish, English, and Portuguese):

Montenegro: Hrabri Sokoli (The Brave Falcons)
Czech Republic: Lokomotiva (The Locomotive)
Greece: To Piratiko (The Pirate Ship)
Angola: Palancas Negras (Black Antelopes)
South Africa: Bafana Bafana
Zambia: Chipolopolo (The Copper Bullets)
Cameroon: Lions Indomptables (The Indomitable Lions)
Egypt: Al-Fara'enah (The Pharaohs)
Columbia: Los Cafeteros (The Coffee Growers)
Jamaica: The Reggae Boyz
Iraq: Isood Al-Rafidayn (The Lions of Mesopotamia)
Japan: Samarai Blue
Thailand: Changsuk (The War Elephants)
Australia: The Socceroos
North Korea: Choilima (The Thousand-Mile Horse)

And there are plenty more that can be found here. FIFA also has a nice article on the subject.

There are nicknames for the US team listed, though "The Yanks" is the only one that I have heard mentioned in soccer circles. And to be honest, it could use some improvement. A lot of improvement. Not even the US Soccer team web site mentions it or any other name. C'mon guys, if even the North Koreans can come up with a creative nickname why can't we? The team's fan club, Sam's Army, came up with a decent one for themselves. Shouldn't they be able to find one for our team?

On a similar subject there is this bit of commentary in Yahoo! News from a British ex-pat living here in the USA saying that we will never love soccer, football, whatever you want to call it, like they do in Brazil, England, and pretty much every other nation in the world. Here are some examples of this man's "insight":

"Across Europe, Asia and Africa, advertisers are falling all over themselves to endorse official products and to use players and logos in their spots. But not in America, the richest, and arguably most sports mad, country in the world. Here the desperate hype of those outlets that have the rights to cover the tournament barely makes itself heard over the NBA and Stanley Cup finals."

"... it took almost half a century and the intervention of Henry Kissinger to bring the 1994 World Cup to the United States. And within three years "The Simpsons" was already lampooning soccer as a sport so boring that it bred hooliganism between supporters fighting to leave the stadium first."

As the teams walk onto the field in Rustenberg, South Africa this Saturday, there will be a sizeable viewing audience in America. Perhaps it will be difficult to measure the exact number since American patriots and English expats will crowd into bars to watch the game. But the passion will be for the event, not the game. Although more Americans play soccer than ever before, although the women's team is the reigning Olympic champion and although the MLS is improving quality year by year, America doesn't love the game the way Brazil loves the game.

"America hasn't yet grasped the fact that soccer is much more like baseball than football. It's a game of the head played with the body through a hundred years of history and culture."

Once again we have someone trashing America because we don't love "the beautiful game" like the rest of the world does. Even being a dedicated soccer fan that I am I cannot just sit by and listen to this nonsense. Yes, America doesn't love the game the way Brazil loves the game, but I am willing to bet my Brazil visa (that I'll be using in just a couple of weeks; yes I'll post pictures) that Brazil doesn't love American football, baseball, or basketball the way America loves these games. Different cultures have different loves and there is nothing wrong with that, nothing at all. Great for Brazil that they love futbol like they do but that doesn't mean that America has to or that we are any worse as a nation or as a people for not loving the same game. Since when has soccer become the politically correct game as well as the beautiful game?

The last quoted line really bothers me in that it implies that America doesn't appreciate "a game of the head" with "a hundred years of history and culture." So Americans are a bunch of idiots who only like idiot games with no history or culture. If you don't think basketball is a "game of the head" then how do you explain the creativity that players like Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, and so many others have brought to the game, not to mention the strategies of coaches like Red Auerbach, Pat Riley, and Phil Jackson (or even Don Nelson, as wacky as he is). And if want to talk about "games of the head", let me introduce you to Peyton Manning, Bill Belechek, Walter Payton, and so many other players and coaches of the so-called "other" type of football that have shown plenty of mental acuity on the field in a sport that has just as much tradition as the association game. Why do you think both sports are called "football" anyway?

Our sports that we love are just as good as anyone else's, and despite the fact that we do not and may never love soccer as much as Brazil or any other country does we have still managed to put together a pretty good team. Now if we can only come up with a lovely nickname for them.

You think America doesn't care about soccer? Just ask this guy, who used soccer as a means to escape from a Nazi POW camp and won the game for his team even though his English coach didn't think a "Yank" could play the game:

I suppose that it is about time...

... that I post something here to remind everyone who doesn't read my American Idol blog that I am still alive. Idol is done for the year and I am leaning towards not doing any posts there next season, so hopefully I will again renew my snarky views of life over here.

This oil spill thing, for example. If you can find anything positive about this I'm dying to here it. Here you have President Obama, who promised to change Washington politics, acting like a Washington politician when he says that the only thing the government did wrong was to put too much trust in BP to stop the leak. Is not the government responsible for cleaning up the oil? Where were the booms? Why did it take them a couple of weeks to start the cleanup? And where were the inspectors when the faulty oil rig was constructed and maintained? Instead of being the statesman that we voted for he has morphed into yet another politician looking for some evil corporation to blame and looking to use a disaster to advance a political agenda. His policy to reduce the likelihood of future oil spills is to stop drilling for oil? How about inspecting some more rigs? Having no oil rigs may be pie in the sky thinking but flies in the face of reality.

And then there are the morons at BP who tried to blame the oil rig operator Transocean for a "relatively tiny" oil spill (seriously, their words, not mine), required fishermen who volunteered for the rescue effort to sign a limit of liability contract with BP, and has a CEO who cares more about getting "his life back" than about the millions of barrels of oil his busted pipeline is spewing into the Gulf of Mexico. Oh sure, he apologized later for his comments later, but then his press secretary Randy Prescott says that "Louisiana isn’t the only place that has shrimp.” I love this response from Louisiana: “And BP isn’t the only place that has fuel for my car!” Admit it, gentlemen, you f***ed up big time here and heads need to roll, starting with yours.

And even when BP and the government actually work together on something (which they should be doing all along instead of this finger pointing) they still find a way to muck it up, such as this ongoing public feud BO is having with the EPA about which dispersants to use to soak up the oil. It has gotten so bad that even that wacky Sarah Palin has gotten into the act, claiming that the reason the government and BP have been so slow to respond to the spill is because BP gave President Obama a lot of money in the last campaign, which of course was front page news on Fox because it plays into that vast left wing conspiracy theory that Miss Alaska USA and her comrades subscribe to no matter how unlikely it is that two models of incompetency can somehow conspire to organize something like this.

Here's the deal, the government and BP need to agree on a way to cap the busted shaft and clean up the oil now. Together. One cannot do it without the other, no matter how much they want to. Stop the finger pointing, stop the politics, stop the blame game, stop trying to either downplay or exaggerate the problem to make yourselves look better and the other guy look worse. It didn't work after Hurricane Katrina and the Exxon Valdez oil spill and it is not working here either. This is not rocket science. You want proof of that? Well how about we ask what one of the most successful oil man ever would do in a situation like this...


Now here is an honest oil man if there ever was one, and he didn't take no guff from no government official, that's for sure. When Jed Clampett had an oil spill in his backyard did he point any fingers? Hell no, he sold that spill and provided a better life for his whole clan in Beverly Hills, both in black & white and color. And whenever he had a problem that needed solving ol' Jed would sit on the curbstone of his mansion and whittle until he came up with the answer. Maybe if President Obama and BP CEO Tony Hayward would sit at their mansions and whittled until they came up with an answer they could get this thing cleaned up and allow us to focus on other, more important things.

And yes, I waited all this time to find a blog post topic that I could use Jed Clampett as an example. The photo is from TVLand.com, BTW. I don't want to have to sign a LOL either.